Who You Are When You Stop Being Useful to everyone?
Does your exhaustion measure your worth?
As a full-time law student and caregiver, I’m learning that I must include myself among those I care for.
For too long, I believed that being “good” meant endless service:
I struggle to get help with my mom – because I am socialise to know being a good daughter means being a built in 24/7 caregiver- God will bless me
Growing up in foster care as a girl:
I was raised to serve
To be a caretaker
To be self-sacrificial and to have no needs of my own
I was taught to give everything soo much that I didnt have a context of my self outside of my usefulness to other people
I was Bobette the builder and super care giver, in every relationship and organisation: I was a good worker, a good comrade, a good person
I had to go to therapy to learn I was worthy of rest. That’s how deep this conditioning runs.
But here’s what I’ve discovered:
Rest isn’t the absence of productivity—it’s what makes sustainable productivity possible
I deserve to exist in with a context of myself thats not tied to my usefulness to other people
I’m still working on my projects in the midst of a lot of rest, I am allowing myself to be helped with mommy, still pursuing my dreams.
To my fellow hard workers: You don’t have to earn your rest. You deserve it simply because you exist.
Your worth isn’t your work.
Your value isn’t your availability.
Your humanity isn’t your hustle.
Rest well. It’s an act of self-love AND rebellion. 💪✨
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